Walking in circles always helps

The weather has been encouraging so I've been meeting a friend on the vita course not far from our house. I was last there on a regular basis during Katrina. I guess its during times of crisis that we need it most. Its here. We've always loved it and don't know why I don't go there everyday. Something else to add to my list as we walk out the door to mail our father's day cards.

Speaking of which - my dad recently retired and decided his new hobby is calling me several times a day. He must have a great long distance plan. I am happy he wants to talk to ME but usually we talk about my SISTER and her children who are always in need of parental guidance.

Our discourse on what my sister should or shouldn't be doing with her life is time consuming and pointless. I was sold on the nature/nurture research years ago (based on identical twins separated at birth). It concluded that humans are born with their own unique wiring and regardless of what parents do or don't do their kids are born prone to certain traits: narcissism, addiction, cheerfulness, martydom, generosity, rightousness, grumpiness, etc...

I don't know if there is a darn thing we can do to help my sister and her two teenage daughters. She has never taken responsibility for her decisions and her daughters are very much like my sister and me. Both are stubborn and willfull. The oldest takes responsibility for herself and her decisions but pretty much does as she damn well pleases (she's 17) and the younger tries to figure out what you want to hear, tells you that - but then does exactly what she wants to do as well. Their dad doesn't believe in parental guidance. (really) The younger of the two is 16. I adore them but worry about them all the time.

I've always done things my way (for better or worse) but am harder than anyone on me when I come discover the error of my ways. My husband puts up with it better than I would. I am old fashioned in that I believe in accountability - in all our decisions, too (!) and I don't interfere... much. I do have a habit of telling people what I think. This isn't a very popular way of communicating in the 21st C. Many people poll their friends to see what they should think. I lack the kind of filter or security system between my brain and mouth that many people have. Oh well...

When our government can't take responsibility for the error of its ways why should my sister? Until she can embrace her mistakes she'll keep making them... just like our government! Maybe its a Rush thing. She always liked him. We are about as different as two women can be who share the same genes, same parents, same family tree. Its a mystery. Nature vs Nurture... nature wins.